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How Important is Finance in a Relationship?

It has been discovered over time that the majority of the misunderstandings couples have in marriage or relationship is money related. Love is expensive, that is why you cannot exclude the issue of finance in a relationship. For instance, when you start a relationship, you will need to call often, send messages, etc. social media has made it easier, however, you still have to spend money for data subscriptions. For the extremely romantic ones, you will need to buy gifts once in a while. You also go on dates, visit the person and all these cost money.  There is this entitlement mindset that a lot of ladies have that needs to be eradicated completely before even getting into the relationship so that our finance won’t get in the way of the relationship.

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The general perception that a man must be the sole provider in a relationship is absolutely wrong. I have heard a lot of ladies say they must be with a guy who must provide and cater for them. I make bold to say that this is false! There is no law that states that men should provide. Women of this generation have become lazy because they grow up with the mentality that a man will eventually marry them and provide for them. I am also aware that as much as there are lazy women who are dependent there are also lazy men who won’t want to work and are bent on depending on what the woman makes. It is easy to spot this kind of men. I will do a post on how to spot them later.

Marriage is supposed to be a partnership. Women were created to be helpers and independent, that is why women are regarded as a helpmeet for the man. No man wants to get married to a liability. Most women have amazing skills, but because they are too dependent they do not explore these skills. It is women who possess incredible multitasking skills, for example, a woman can read, eat and watch television at the same time. Most men cannot do this. Being in a relationship isn’t always about what you can get. You should be willing to give. If you do not have the capacity to give, you won’t have the capacity to love because love is about giving. In order for finance not to be an issue in a relationship, both parties must learn how to make money, manage money and how to multiply money. Enough of this belief that a man should take sole responsibility for the finance in a relationship. Now, I do not mean that you should be a gold digger and look out for men who seem to have it all together financially…..seven figure salary, comfortable apartment, luxury cars e.t.c….neither am I saying you should short change yourself and settle for less. Find yourself a man that even though he does not have a lot to offer financially, at least he shows gestures of generosity and the desire to become much more than what he is now.


Chinye Onwamaka is a professional makeup artist and fashion consultant based in Lagos Nigeria. She writes about fashion, beauty and relationship tips for young people.


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